Six

It was only when Chen Mobei looked at me with a cold expression that I realized my own foolishness. How could I have thought to seek his help? At this moment, how much he must despise someone like me who is unfaithful in matters of the heart

Since Gu Meng began to avoid him, he has also been too lazy to seek her out. However, on sleepless nights, with no one to talk to, he feels quite frustrated.

Chen Mobei later swore that he had only invited her on a whim. I raised my eyebrows and smiled, saying that it didn't matter what his original intention was, as the goal had been achieved anyway

While I was washing the dishes with the elderly, Zhou Jianian was sitting in the courtyard, playing happily with that little black dog. He held a cigarette in his hand, blowing smoke rings at the little black dog. The stars in the rural night sky were so bright, and I think I will never forget that scene for the rest of my life

He stared into my eyes, and in his bright pupils was my face. He did not need to say anything; his gaze had already conveyed all the words he wished to express but could not. I leaned my head gently against his shoulder, and in that moment, I thought, let me bear all the suffering alone.

The old man goes to bed early; before it was even 9 o'clock, he had already returned to his room to sleep. Before going to bed, he even prepared a new bedding for me. I secretly asked Zhou Jianian, "I will sleep on the bed, so where will you sleep?"

A few minutes later, he called and said: "I really dislike texting; it's clearer to talk on the phone. I truly have something to attend to next week, and I will speak to Yihan myself about it."

Grandma Zhou whispered to me: "Young lady, Jia Nian has never brought a girl home before. If you don't mind this place, please come and visit Grandma more often in the future"

Four hours later, I stood in front of the dilapidated platform of the small bus station with Zhou Jianian. I looked at the yellowed walls and the mottled slogans, trying hard to appear indifferent.

This moment is a lifetime. I walked over barefoot, squatted in front of him, and gently kissed him

The yard was covered with peanuts drying in the sun. As soon as I stepped in, I crushed a few of them. Zhou Jianian turned around and glared at me, and I immediately fell silent.

Loneliness is the terminal illness of the century, and none of us in this generation can escape it

Meanwhile, I racked my brains and replied with a message: "Why can't you come? Lu Yihan will be very disappointed."

He looked at me, a mysterious expression on his face, and said: "Su Wei, your behavior would likely have resulted in being punished by being submerged in a pig cage in ancient times"

When I go crazy, I am more terrifying than Qing Tian. She just kept saying to Zhou Jianian, "I like you, we can make it, let's try being together." But when I stood at the entrance of the station with my luggage and ticket blocking Zhou Jianian, what I said was, "You must be with me"

He laughed contemptuously and casually said, "Do as you please"

I raised my head to look at Zhou Jianian, and I was on the verge of tears

Many people have commented below, saying that it is truly beautiful and has a wonderful temperament

How can I let Lu Yihan know that I fabricated such a lie? So I hurriedly said: "Forget it, forget it, forget it, it's nothing, it's nothing, it's nothing"

How many lonely individuals in this world toss and turn in the unchanging night, unable to sleep? On the streets of every city, how many couples, seemingly united yet emotionally distant, merely hold each other's hands out of fear of solitude

Never has anyone been able to make Su Wei so neurotic and cautious

Zhou Jianian replied to my message a day later. At that time, I was accompanying Chen Mobei to a photography exhibition. When my phone vibrated, I glanced at it absentmindedly, and after that glance, I almost wanted to scream

If it is said that in our long youth, everyone has encountered a calamity, then that photograph marks the beginning of Lin Lanshan's calamity

I looked at her pale face and wondered what it would look like if she cried

I think I am probably going mad, and the reason that drives me to madness may very well be what is known as love

After a pause, I said: "You don't need to look at me like that; I am not afraid of any difficult circumstances."

He called out loudly for his grandmother, and then I saw an elderly lady with unsteady steps come out from the inner room

I fabricated a lie. I sent a text message to Zhou Jianian, saying: "Next Saturday is my birthday, and I hope my friends will grace me with their presence. This message is sent to multiple recipients, Su Wei."

In fact, I have previously gone home to have dinner with several boyfriends, and meeting parents is something I am quite familiar with. However, for some reason, I have never felt this nervous before. I slowly moved behind Zhou Jianian and tightly grasped the sleeve of his shirt.

He raised the DSLR he won in the company anniversary celebration lottery and pressed the shutter button, aiming at a girl who stood quietly among the crowd

Suddenly, there was a moment of silence on that end. For some reason, I felt that the same smile from last time reappeared on his face, and for a moment, I did not know how to respond.

I am unhappy again, this crow's mouth, how does he know that I am not his grandmother's granddaughter-in-law

Later, when I asked her why she was willing to go hiking with Chen Mobei that day, she replied to me nonchalantly, "Because he is handsome"

All beings are silent, I only desire this moment

It was originally agreed that we would go hiking together on the weekend, but due to my irresponsibility, Chen Mobei could only go alone. Just as he was about to log off QQ, Lanshan's avatar lit up.

She then warmly pulled me into the house, asking me what I would like to eat and drink. Before I had the chance to respond, she brought out many snacks that I loved during my childhood, such as peanut brittle, winter melon candy, and pistachios

My nose tinged with a sour sensation, and tears almost fell down, but fortunately, I managed to hold them back in time, forcing a smile at the elderly person and saying, "Alright." I certainly couldn't tell the elder that it wasn't Zhou Jianian who brought me here, but rather that I had shamelessly followed along myself.

I say: "I am a new woman of the new era, unafraid to pursue true love, regardless of the cost I may have to pay."

Chen Mobei let out a cold laugh; he felt that it was simply not worth reasoning with someone like me

Zhou Jianian was solely focused on eating, and when Grandma Zhou asked him to serve me some dishes, he ignored her, glaring at me with rice in his mouth, "Don't you have hands yourself?"

It was only after we were together that he admitted that when he saw the so-called mass message I sent, he suddenly felt that Su Wei wasn't actually that annoying after all

However, if I do not eat, it will surely hurt the elder's feelings; I can only smile on the surface while tears flow in my heart as I shovel food into my mouth

I stood at the entrance of the station, wearing sportswear and holding a motorcycle bag, blocking Zhou Jianian's way. I admit that I deceived him; this day is not my birthday, but it is a day of great significance to me

After getting on the bus, I turned off my phone. Since I had purchased a standing ticket, I could only awkwardly stand in the narrow aisle, unsure of what to do as the passing carts kept coming and going.

Meanwhile, Chen Mobei uploaded the photos he took at the photography exhibition to the forum's discussion board. The girl he photographed was wearing a bright red sweater, her demeanor was proud and aloof, creating a striking contrast with the red she wore

That night I slept in the guest room, while he slept on the sofa in the guest room. I woke up in the middle of the night feeling thirsty and saw the moonlight shining on his face

Grandma Zhou first smiled as she looked up and down at Zhou Jianian, and only then did she notice me curled up behind him, smiling more awkwardly than crying. At the moment her somewhat clouded eyes, eroded by time, saw me, they lit up.

Zhou Jianian snorted through his nose, as if in disdain, yet also as if he were unperturbed by the oddity

He gently held it, with his fingers interlocked.

Half an hour later, he finally got up and pulled me over to sit in his seat. I looked up and glanced at Zhou Jianian, who still had a blank expression on his face

It took a great deal of effort to gradually obtain information about him, often pretending to be casual in encouraging Lu Yihan to contact him, and feigning calmness while meticulously gathering snippets of information and fragments of conversation about him at every gathering. I secretly found his name on Lu Yihan's phone, memorized that number, and dared not save it in my own phone for fear of alarming him.

During the days of my disappearance, Lu Yihan had to make an average of three to four calls each day to inquire whether Chen Mobei had any news about me. On one hand, Chen Mobei was gritting his teeth in anger at me in his heart, while on the other hand, he had to conceal my whereabouts, which was quite arduous.

God knows why I am like this. In the past, I looked down on those girls who played petty tricks for the sake of boys. It turns out I am not as different as I thought. When I truly want to get close to someone, I too will go to great lengths.

He turned his face and mockingly asked me: "Aren't you afraid of not having a private bathroom? Aren't you afraid of having to empty the sputum bowl yourself?"

In my lifetime, there has never been a moment as fervent as this; it is also the first time I have come to realize that I can love someone with such passion.

We walked one after the other on the country path, the air filled with the fragrance of plants. I looked at the slender figure ahead of me and, in an instant, suddenly thought how wonderful it would be if We can make it never returned

I had truly eaten too much, and I implored him to take me for a walk to help with digestion. I was fully prepared to be refused, but unexpectedly, he agreed.

All the blame shall be borne by me alone

She is reserved and seldom smiles, not out of suppressed emotions, but rather from a genuine calmness. Later, we came to understand that the essence of her character is shaped by the genes inherited from her mother.

As I thought this, I uncontrollably stepped forward and slipped my hand into his pocket. His hand, which was originally in the pocket, clearly paused for a moment, and during that pause, I felt my heart leap to my throat

Lan Shan is a girl of a completely different type from Gu Meng, and also entirely different from Qing Tian and me. Before and after her, we have never seen such a serene and carefree face.

Lan Shan was truly unfortunate; she appeared in Chen Mo Bei's life during his most disheartened and frustrated moments. Years later, Chen Mo Bei himself had to admit that the reason he approached Lan Shan was not due to her stunning beauty, nor out of admiration, but rather because of his loneliness

Everything has been completely turned upside down; Su Wei, who used to only know how to accept, has begun to understand what it means to give.

I hurriedly shook Chen Mobei and said, "Quickly teach me how to respond! My mind is not functioning!"

He finally did something that a person would do; he walked behind his grandmother, held onto the elderly woman, and smiled as he said: "Grandma, you misunderstood, she is not your granddaughter-in-law"

But he did not, did not speak harshly as I had thought, nor did he push my hand away

How could I not be afraid? Just hearing him say that makes me want to vomit, but I cannot show it. Otherwise, from that moment on, how would he see me differently from how he sees Qing Tian or other girls?

The next day, Chen Mobei received an internal message. The profile picture belonged to a person resembling Crayon Shin-chan, who said: "I am the girl in the red sweater, please send me the original photo."

He replied to me: "I have something to attend to and cannot go. I wanted to wish you a happy birthday in advance."

It would have been enough if she had just served it, but she kept shoving it into my hands, as if afraid I would be polite.

The desolation of that time can be summarized in a few words: no resentment, no anger, no contention, and focusing on self-cultivation

Let Su Wei replace the world that has wronged him to make amends, let me use all my strength to bring him out of the past filled with indifference and lack of love, let me offer this vibrant heart with both hands for him to trample as he wishes

No longer returning, there is no need to bear the condemnation from traditional morals

No longer going back, there is no need to pay attention to the voices of self-blame and guilt within.

I will not go back, so there is no need to face the entangled relationships any longer

He suddenly felt that if Su Wei were not Lu Yihan's girlfriend, if Su Wei were just Su Wei, merely a girl named Su Wei, how much simpler everything would be!

He still looks like a dead man, "Who said you sleep in the bed? I sleep in the bed, you sleep on the floor"

Just when I was feeling despondent and considering hanging up the phone, he suddenly said: "I will be going back to my hometown next Saturday to visit my grandmother"

That evening, Grandma Zhou prepared a lot of dishes for dinner. Seeing that I was too thin, she was worried that I wouldn't be full, so she even served my rice in a vegetable bowl. Holding that bowl of white rice piled high like a mountain, I pondered to myself that this was probably the amount of carbohydrates I usually consumed in a day.

However, I did not plead with Zhou Jianian to give up his seat for me. I clearly understand that the path I have chosen will lead to challenges in the future that will be more arduous than standing for four hours.

It was only when I arrived at Grandma Zhou's house that I realized this scoundrel had deceived me; the environment is not that poor, it simply cannot compare to the splendor of the city, and daily life is not a problem at all

I feign nonchalance; my acting skills are indeed superior to those of Chen Mobei and Gu Meng. If they are merely third-rate television actors, then I am an Oscar-winning actress

But until she left us and went to Beijing, I had never seen her shed a single tear

However, I still firmly argue that if I have clearly fallen in love with someone else yet continue to stay with Lu Yihan, that would be the true betrayal of love

No longer returning, there is no need to face the bustling and noisy city again